The Weekend of Beni

I love birthdays, I love any excuse for a celebration, and I love the boy so I decided to make his birthday as big of a deal as I make mine.  He is without a doubt the most unselfish guy I know, constantly giving to other people....so I did m best to give him the American birthday treatment he never had.  Birthdays are big for them too but I could tell by the way he eyed his stack of 10 presents that he has never been given this much.

I love buying presents, especially when you know exactly what to get the person.  He was easy, he doesn't have much, the hard part was stopping myself from swiping my credit card everytime I saw something that he would like.  Thank god the birthday is over, any longer and I would have maxed out my card!

I am not the domestic one in our relationship but I did manage to stir up my inner Susy Homemaker in the kitchen.  His cousins laughed as I baked a cake, made BBQ chicken, and whipped up some dips.  They didn't see the Betty Crocker box or the dip seasonings but I suspect they would have been just as impressed.  As 9 Albanian men sat around my spread and decorated room, I could tell they were slightly nervous about testing anything the American girlfriend made.  I won them over eventually thanks to the beauty of jello shots.

They looked at my alcoholic creation, baffled by the taste and consistency.  As each person arrived, another forced the shots on them....it was like the terrible party joke, try this, and they laughed as the next person gagged on the vodka flavored jello.  After the first round of shots and two cases of beer, they were a little more willing to try my food, taco dip, ranch dip and veggies were a big hit, especially with each beer.  English conversation was limited but they took turns translating for me.  We drank, danced, drank more, and laughed as everyone got drunker.  I was spent back in the kitchen to make more of those American shots, there were girls coming and heaven forbid if these ladies didn't get a chance to gag on jello.  The cousin danced around, joking about who would get a shot at the 3 women...  My money was on his cousin and little brother, little brother may barely speak english but he's goodlooking and his cousin could talk the pants off anyone but with Albanians it could be anyones game!

The girls arrived: 3 Latvian girls decked out for the club.  It was clear we were not the same type of girls but despite our obvious differences I was impressed they could open beers with their dangerously long fake nails.  Jamel sent me in to the living room to chat with them, I am the resident wing woman afterall!  3 girls meant english conversation, plus it's always nice to add a few more boobs in the room.

They were the next to be handed the American shots and with them shots were passed around until the jello was gone.  And since no party is complete without beer pong, I taught my Albanian and Latvian friends my favorite drinking game.  It was funny and sad at the same time, only sad because my boyfriend hit every cup and kicked my ass.  So much for showing off my skills....

As people fought to get Beni off the table, I organized another round of shots, while his cousins danced around me, stopping only to pick me up and spin me around.  When there was a break in the game, Rocky and I got the cake ready.  We made a sad attempt at singing between my horrible voice and broken english, Happy Birthday has never sounded like such torture.  I made Betty Crocker proud!  Unfortunately I had no one to laugh with when the 3 girls asked me for my wonderful chocolate cake recipe...I assured them it was simple as I served seconds to Beni and his brothers.  Apparently Betty Crocker, Jello Shots, and Beer Pong are the way to the Albanian heart...

We drank until the sun came up, the birthday boy and I ended up sleeping on the floor surrounded by cousins and friends.  Over breakfast the next morning (I cooked omelets for the boys...I know I am a domestic diva at least for one weekend) I heard that my predictions were right...Little brother and his cousin did succeed to take a female prize....

All my hard kitchen work was well worth it, Beni has never looked so happy and I know he had a wonderful birthday.  I accepted his thanks and he assured me he knew my cooking and cleaning were not going to become an everday occurance.